When there are no Words, Call on This Inner Ally

Have you ever experienced a feeling of deep emotion, when there are no words to describe it?

When there are no words you might be speechless and surprised. Sometimes it happens when you’ve been profoundly touched by something or someone.

It can also happen when things around you seem to be swirling out of control. In that situation, you’re probably shocked, startled, and stunned.

Considering recent events and the fact that it’s a frightening time for a lot of people, I’ve written this post to help you access an archetypal part of you that’s ready to be your ally.

But before I introduce that ally, let’s explore what you may be dealing with first.

Lately you might be experiencing a lack of words because you see things being torn down and feel like you have no control.

While some people applaud this kind of destruction and believe the only way to build something better is to burn it all down, for many others the feelings that rise to the top are anxiety, anger, and depression.

When there are no words you may feel empty, numb, detached, and lonely.

When the ground under you doesn’t feel solid and some things you thought you knew seem to fly out the window, a kind of nameless grief can grab you and ask: Where does it hurt?

Warsan Shire’s beautiful poem illustrates this…

…later that night

I held an atlas in my lap

Ran my fingers across the whole world

And whispered

Where does it hurt?

It answered

everywhere

everywhere

everywhere

It’s important right now to give yourself space to soothe the hurt you feel, and then, when you’re ready, consider turning toward that inner archetypal ally I alluded to: your Inner Destroyer archetype.

The Destroyer becomes our ally when we recognize the need to change or give something up without denying the pain or grief involved.

-Carol Pearson

Your Inner Destroyer archetype is ready to stand with you.

You may be wondering: who is my Inner Destroyer archetype?

It’s a force of nature within you, the part who understands that there are times in life when you need to focus on…

• emptying out and opening up
• loss, grief, metamorphosis, and renewal
• unearthing your deeper fears and naming them
• finding meaning when things feel meaninglessness
• releasing what no longer supports your values, life, growth

The Destroyer archetype is also known as the Revolutionary, Outlaw, and Rebel.

Calling forth this archetype during times of outer destruction is a wise practice.

While you may have little or no influence over the tearing down that’s going on around you, it is possible to call upon your Inner Destroyer to help you understand the larger archetypal energies at work today. It can also fortify you to take a stand when you need to.

In the world right now we’re mostly witnessing the Shadow Destroyer: blowing things up, betraying promises made, lashing out, creating chaos and mess, exhibiting out of control anger, and creating false narratives.

But when you activate your own healthy Inner Destroyer in a conscious way, you can focus on a positive and balanced experience of it that opens the door to clarity about what truly matters most for you right now.

Complete these sentence strings to begin connecting with you Inner Destroyer:

• I feel confused about…
• I’m experiencing anger or resistance around…
• When I hold on I feel…
• When I let go I feel…
• My values and continued growth are asking me to release…

Finally, activating the Destroyer archetype can help you claim your words when there are no words.

You might discover an unexpected sense of security waiting for you, beyond the destruction going on in the world around you.

Several clients have mentioned that doing the work of healthy destruction and letting go in therapy has brought them to a place where it is easier to cultivate a sense of security and the acceptance that things will happen the way they are going to happen.

In the long run the Destroyer can help you:

• process grief and loss
• cultivate inner trust
• stay on an even keel
• practice acceptance
• reach out for connection
• heal during dark times
• develop practices to cope with destruction
• find words when there are no words

The Destroyer Archetype is central to metamorphosis and often strikes people in the prime of life who have a fully developed identity and a belief in their ability to cope.

-Carol Pearson

If you’re a woman who’s approaching (or in) your midlife and beyond years and it feels like something’s missing…you’re who I created the Wisdom Tending Circle for.

JOIN THE WAITLIST and find out more about this creative and supportive women’s group that journeys through the archetypal energies and archetypal landscapes of midlife and beyond.